At times when we try and think about our lives,you always want to undo certain decisions , certain situations, certain sayings etc.Why do we feel so ? Either we are not happy with it or we have moved away from that phase.Its strange but true !
Its so strange that when A some one special does not stirs the same emotions like the way few years back.That if you suddenly drift away from certain relationships when actually you were holding on so tight.

Few people without whom you couldnt live without,now you cannot live with the same person.Its strange yet true !

Moments which were special earlier has becoming boring now.Long conversations which went on for hours together has now reduced to minutes and seconds just because you dont have anything to talk.....What an irony !

to be contd

I wish i was born as a MAN

I could walk on streets with just my shorts on and noone would give a damn.

I could attend late night parties without my folks breathing down my neck

I could walk into a local bar with my friends and enjoy a drink

I could have spent my weekends enjoying my cricket matches than learning cooking

I wish i was born as a MAN

I wouldnt have to comply with social obligations such as MARRIAGE !!!

I wouldnt have to deal with men staring at our' assets '

I wouldnt have to deal with people stare at my cigarette or at my clothes

I wouldnt have to deal with relatives worrying about my marriage,career,kids ( phew ! )....

I wouldnt have to cope up with Moral responsibilities of being wife,daughter in law,mother,daughter ,sister and the so called ' This is your duty ' things.


I wish i was born as a MAN but am happy being a WOMAN.

Next exciting part of my Gma’s life.I used to feel important with her because of the attention I revd.Both of us used to literally talk everything under the sun.Some incidents are so livid in my memory- I used to finish my college infact most of the times used to bunk my classes just because could sit with her and watch Mahabharata with her.We used to enjoy watching mythological serials,reading books on it.Infact that’s the reason why she would be so comfortable with me.I was and am still ,just like her.Enjoying reading a lot,writing,eating ,shopping and traveling.Oops I forgot to mention this at all- How forgetful I can get..My Gma has re-translated and written Ramayana from Hindi to Kannada 4 times.Which is approx 40000 pages.She gave 1 set each comprising of 2 books to all the 4 families.My mom still keeps it in Dasara along with other books for the Saraswati puja.My Gma used to read the entire Ramayana ( which some 1000’s of pages ) during Dasara and used to finish it in this 1 month. Ok coming back to my story with her.I used to visit her often everyday and the best part was we used to have bhel puri with me.When ever I used to meet her she would say “ Go and get Bhel puri fast.Otherwise your mom wont allow you to eat “.She and my aunt ( my Doddappa- Tau’s wife used to not get along well with each other.My mom was pretty close enough with her and of course me too.Her health was deteriorating for which my mom was pretty strict in her eating habits.

It has been a long time since I have not posted anything but there are reasons to it.1 – lack of energy and 2 – lack to sbjects to write.Today I was going my childhood photographs when I saw my Grandma’s snap.Thats when I realised how much I miss her.Of couse she is no more but I always wish she would be a lill longer.Whats so special ?All of us love their grandparents but my G Mom was really special ,a woman of substance,character and love-Someone whom I admire the most in the life.My grandma was born in 1920 to a very affluent family.Her dad was serving in the Police department and had 2 wives ( God how did he manage !!! Cant manage 1 nowadays ).She was the only girl in the house hold and had 7 Brothers.Naturally apple of the eye,so she was given the best of education.She studied English ,Hindi,Tamil,Kannada and Urdu ,along with extra curricular activities as swimming.Whew! On top of it she is a Hindi Visharad ( the highest qualifiying exam as good as a doctorate in a particular language ) Can you believe it ! In 1920’s when female infanticide was ( and is still ) rampant,my grandma was brought up just like her brothers.I was told her she had an entire showcase filled with silver toys to play.Oh my god!!! Wish my dad also gives me 1 silver toy to play now….She was given complete freedom to do what ever she liked.She learnt singing,making dolls,hand weaving cane toys,baskets,chairs phew……and me –don’t know anything except talking…..She lived in a palatial bungalow ( considering the property rates you can term it as a bungalow ) in Chitradurga,Karnataka. This is just the beginning.Her story is nothing less than a hindi masala movie.She fell in love with my grandpa who was studying medicine.He was maternally related to her.Her mom was furious and rejected the proposal outright.G Ma simply walked out of the house saying that she will marry my G pa at any cost.Just imagine walking out of acres and acres of property,money + how can I forget showcase with silver toys.She had the determination that she is going to live happily with my Gpa for the rest of her life…Now starts the sad part.My Gpa got into the Indian railways and as we all know Gov service means getting tranfered to unknown places.They had 4 kids –Will not write the complete names ( am lazy guys pls bear with me ) Shesh,Raghu,Viji,Shar -2 boys and 2 girls.My gmom couldn’t accompany my gpa to all the places.My Gpa was away most of the times.So she single handedly managed all the 4 kids and the household.Guys don’t forget this is in 1940’s.It seems those days kids from railway colonies used to get spoilt very soon.Gambling,smoking,drinking etc used to be very common and quite popular among the kids and adults.My Gmom raised the kids in such a way that not one among them till now has given in to the vices inspite of having such of people aroud them.I would say Hats off to her upbringing !!!We find it “ extremely “ difficult to just raise 1 kid….given with all the possible comforts. She had all the 4 kids finish their education and helped them to settle down in their respective lives.Not that her story has come to the end.My uncle had 2 sons who literally gew up with her coz both ( my uncle and aunt ) were working.So the next comfortable solution is leaving both the kids with my Gmom.That’s wht most of us do nowadays.Our parents fill in our shoes and we …don’t know ….Maybe the week end parents.I was pretty close to her don’t know the reason yet but was the favourite among all the grandchildren.She used to stay with my uncle from Monday to Friday and weekends come to our house.My Gmom was very passionate about traveling and was quite artistic too.In those days railway employees used to get 2+2 travel concession pass.So the entire family used to travel extensively all over India.Infact there is a very interesting incident .Got to mention this one- My Gmom and Gpa visited a place called Sundarakindi which is supposed to be linked to the great epic Ramayana.It is said that the Vanar sena used to live there and that’s where Sri Ram met Hanuman.It is few kilometers away from Lakshyadeep and was a small island.It so happened when they visited the place and returned to Kanyakumari ,they got to know that the entire island got submerged completely.It just simply vanished from the place and there is no evidence of that island today.Oh my god!!! What an experience that would have been.This particular incident intrigues me so much.Is it true and can we believe this?Only time and Discovery channel should throw light upon this..

This is a very nice mail regarding relationships.Sums up all the things
A SOULFUL RELATIONSHIP -by Rev. Ronald McFadden An African proverb
states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you
marry, close one eye."
Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let
lust, desperation, immaturity and ignorance, pressure from others or a
low self-esteem, make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open,
and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see
as faults aren't really important.
Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws,
vulnerabilities, pet peeves and differences will become more obvious.
If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve,
you've got to learn to close one eye and not let every little thing
bother you.
You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs,
values, dreams, weaknesses, and strengths. You are two unique individual
children of God who have decided to share a life together. Neither of
you are perfect, but are you perfect for each other? Do you bring out
the best in each other?
Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete,
compare, and control? What do you bring to the relationship? Do you
bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain? You can't
take someone to the altar to alter him or her. You can't make someone
love you or make someone stay.
If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life", you
won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness
or responsible for your pain. Manipulation, control, jealousy,
neediness, and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving,
healthy, loving and lasting relationship!
Seeking status, sex, wealth, and security are the wrong reasons to be in
a relationship. What keeps a relationship strong? Communication,
intimacy, trust, a sense of humor, sharing household tasks, some getaway
time without business or children and daily exchanges (a meal, shared
activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a note). Leave a nice message on the
voicemail or send a nice email. Sharing common goals and interests.
Growth is important. Grow together, not away from each other, giving
each other space to grow without feeling insecure. Allow your mate to
have outside interest. You can't always be together. Give each other a
sense of belonging and assurances of commitment.
Don't try to control one another. Learn each other's family situation.
Respect his or her parents regardless.
Don't put pressure on each other for material goods. Remember for richer
or for poorer. If these qualities are missing, the relationship will
Erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty, and pain.
Replace the passion.
The difference between 'United' and 'Untied' is where you put the i.

Raman.....This is for you.......

Let me start my blog by writing bout Raman,the man who has bought a tremendous difference to my life.Now the question arises why Ram and what is so special about him....( infact people who are in love tend to exaggerate about their partners ) but let me do it in a different way. Ram is one of the most dextrous person i have ever met.You have to listen to his one-liners and his sense of humour ( which i think is very attractive and adds up to his style ).He has such a alluring persona that you automatically get drawn towards him.His sense of adaptibility ,astute & expression makes him very endearing.
What makes him different from the rest are the situations which he had to face in his early years.Such situations, which probably most of us shudder to think of.He stood against all odds ,fought over them with a determination to succeed in life.Wht more can i say about him....
Ram I respect & love you for what you are and remain the same way.I am proud of you!!!!!!!! You have taught me the meaning of love,life & laughter and supported all my decisions without being judgemental .You have helped me in understanding the little nuances of life and enjoy each day as it comes.We have come a long way and invested a lot in this relationship to keep it going.I only wish that we retain this understanding and love for years to come.I know i am being very emotional (which anyways I am, almost 20 days in a month ) but it is a fact and this is something which i wanted to share it with everybody.Today is a special day ,as you enter your 29th year (Guys who are reading this...today is Raman's birthday ),i wanted to do something special and different (hope you like this surprise!!!! ).Could not get a better forum to express myself.Thank you for always being there and also being such an indispensable part of my life.Once again ......

Happy Birthday

This Blog is dedicated to you and us.
Ram I Love You.....Forever